Yesterday was great crack. Haven't really had so much fun in a while it seems. Making new acquaintances, just having relaxed conversation with no need of any thought to the matter. I wonder why these feelings arise so seldom. Is it because I may hold these things at bay? Like if I don't welcome these situations usually. But then I don't find that to be true. I'm usually welcoming to things that I find nice and fulfilling. Do those things even present themselves at all anymore? How come I've become so picky? It's like I'm there and I could enjoy many moments just like the ones yesterday but still can't find myself to enjoy it.
Under which circumstances am I able to enjoy myself? What's so different from everyday and yesterday? I can only find one solid reason. But can it really matter that much? Personally I think it's silly. This whole problem. There shouldn't be any reason to these feelings. It's just plain stupid. But I guess that's just what the psyche is, just plain stupid and irrational. Why can't I just adjust to the situation like any other? Usually I'd have no problem adjusting. Why do I have problems now?
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