A Matter of Meaning

I mean why bother? That will never be reality, not in this lifetime anyway. 


At this point in time it's meaningless.


I noticed that the reactions have payed off. Just now I noticed that a few people had ticked off what they had thought on some of my posts.

Something was given, but wasn't nearly as good as I had hoped... Sorry

No Escape

The blades of darkness have penetrated my chest. I am pinned to the ground. They say time heals all wounds, but what if some wounds are infected? What happens when you are swimming in salt water? The wound hardly heals under such conditions? All they can do is sting. Everything just stings.


I'm surrounded by them, they won't leave me alone. How is sleep supposed to be possible under such conditions? There is no rest in this life of agony. 

The Haunting

It's funny the way things of the past can haunt things of the present. The things you used to feel and fear sneak up on you and you end up with the exact same sensation for no apparent reason. You remember the ache and solitude of the past and it replays in your emotions. It's like a vampire that sucks out your vital energies, refusing to let go.


There are no excuses though. It is my fault and my fault alone. Sure, every now and then I would want to blame the world, but in the end it's all me, not you.


Things aren't going to change by themselves. At best they could be in the right direction already, but that's highly unlikely. We are the ones who have to make sure things change. That's simply a natural law. In order for something to happen it must be affected in the right manner. In other words you have to treat the problem in order for it to get any better. If you want to turn right you'll have to turn the steering wheel as well. That's a simple and logical fact.


Even with this knowledge, many of us struggle with problems. Some may be trivial and some may very well be threatening our lives.


The fire will spread unless you keep it in check. 


Though we have the capacity to understand these things we're not very good at acting upon them. Not only do I leave things for myself, I see others do the same. I try to tell them that it's a bad idea, I know by experience that it is. Leaving things in limbo and pretending they aren't there won't make things right. Leaving the candle under the rope will surely make the rope give out if you leave it there long enough.

It all turns to smoke

Life's Obstacles

I've found myself in a tight spot every now and then. I can feel really stressed out. Still, I go on with my own business as usual, trying to keep everything in check.


Every now and then it shows. Every now and then I have trouble containing myself. Sometimes I show more than intended. I don't like when that happens.


Those dreams where really messed up. I didn't like them at all. I don't understand why it has to disturb me so much. I'm just stressed out with everything that's going on, I suppose.


The nights haven't become any easier. They're just as bad as they ever where. Most nights are far too short, those nights that are long enough aren't efficient enough to keep me going. I can feel how I'm shutting down in efficiency. I haven't the energy needed for everything to work out good for everyone.


I know this must hurt, but I'm trying my best. Please don't be sad.


There are a lot of thing that people don't understand. I don't blame them for not understanding, they couldn't care less and that I blame them for. It just doesn't feel right. What kind of society is this?


I guess I'm sick of those selfish egos. I've listened to those bad excuses. Things that shouldn't matter get in the way. It's unacceptable. Worst of all is all the fake stuff. Those words that are uttered but not a word of it is meant, it's only half true.


They might want something, but they don't want to be a part of it.


Another funny thing is when someone is trying something like that. I really feel sorry for them. It's pathetic and juvenile. Such childish behavior, I'm not surprised though. It wasn't something I wasn't expecting.


You've been silent now a while, have you fallen asleep or are you simply gone? He's not responsive, I wonder if he's dead. Many of you have disappeared, as if you have ceased to exist.


There are only shells left it seems.

A Brief Return

I caught a glimpse of him. It was very brief but I was certain it was him. He isn't dead, he's alive. I'm certain of it now.


I haven't seen him in quite a while. He's been gone and we were all wondering if he had died. I mourned and so did you, we all did. Pathetic little bunch we are. 


I would have liked him to stay longer, but who knows? He might make an appearance once again. The one in his place isn't working out for any of us. He should certainly not be in command of this ship. We are sure to go under with him in command.


We are unhappy with the way things are now. Please come back and return us to what we once where. We can no longer live in this pathetic state. In rot and decay.


This is no way to live...